Heard it in a Love Song

 Heard it in a Love Song

By Bobby Neal Winters

I like Southern Rock: Lynyrd Skynyrd, The Allman Brothers, and the Marshall Tucker Band. I’ve known them from my youth. I was listening to Marshall Tucker’s “Heard it in a Love Song” the other day, and it occurred to me that this is the same song as “Free Bird” and “Ramblin’ Man.” 

For those of you who are not familiar with “Heard it in a Love Song,” it is written from the point of view of a man who is singing to a woman he is in the process of leaving.  He’s explaining to her that it’s not her fault; it’s just the way he is; he’s leaving her; and that’s okay.

The inference she’s supposed to draw is that since he’s being upfront about all this, he’s still a good person.

Heard it in a love song

Heard it in a love song

Heard it in a love song

Can't be wrong

In Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “Free Bird,” the writer is more focused on his own character than the needs and feelings of the woman whom he is leaving. It’s all his fault, and he must leave because that is who he is:

But, if I stay here with you, girl

Things just couldn't be the same

'Cause, I'm as free as a bird now

And this bird you cannot change

The Allman Brothers’ “Ramblin’ Man” makes it clearer.  He was just born this way:

Lord, I was born a ramblin' man

Tryin' to make a livin' and doin' the best I can

And when it's time for leavin', I hope you'll understand

That I was born a ramblin' man

Lest I be remiss, these songs all hearken back to the classic by Looking Glass, 

The sailor said, "Brandy, you're a fine girl What a good wife you would be 

But my life, my love, and my lady is the sea"

There is a point of view that would say that the women who choose these men don’t really want a long-lasting relationship themselves.  They like the bad boys; they choose someone who is going to leave them eventually because they get bored too.  There might be some merit to that, but I will leave it to a woman or to a man braver than me to expand upon.

One could just choose to take the protagonist at face value: He’s just a roamer.  It’s the way he is.  While he has feelings for the woman he’s leaving, there is something he’s wrestling with within himself that is just forcing him to move on down the line.

Yeah.Right.

While a twentysomething might believe that, at sixty it’s difficult to get all that out with a straight face.

In the movie Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. II, Starlord meets his father, the aptly named Ego.  Ego explains to his son, using the lyrics of “Brandy (you’re a fine girl)” that men like them were just different. They couldn’t be tied down. They were too important to be committed to just one woman.

Kurt Russell’s  interpretation of that character and use of the song as illustration, caused me to interpret that song in a new light.

The troubadour, far from being honest with his romantic partner, is being manipulative. (You have no idea how hard it was not to day “a manipulative bastard” there.  Oops, I slipped.) He’s trying to put his girlfriend on the wrong foot, trying to make himself look good, trying to make her think she’s just not sophisticated enough.

Men, this is really not a good look for us.  But let’s continue.

Age does bring knowledge.  

I’ve seen men who’ve used women in such ways over their lives grow old and die alone.

But I’ve also seen men who’ve roamed from woman to woman, discover that they can change, settle down, maybe raise a family.  They discover there is comfort in the sameness of a long-term relationship that more than counterbalances whatever joy is found in the novelty of a continual string of new relationships.

The Free Birds, the Ramblin’ Men, the Sailors, those who heard it in a love song are missing the boat.

Lynyrd Skynyrd got it write in “Simple Man”:

You'll find a woman, yeah, and you'll find love

And don't forget son there is someone up above

And be a simple kind of man

I heard it in a love song; can’t be wrong.

Bobby Winters, a native of Harden City, Oklahoma, blogs at redneckmath.blogspot.com and okieinexile.blogspot.com. He invites you to “like'' the National Association of Lawn Mowers on Facebook. Search for him by name on YouTube. )